Apologies
Admitting
Pointing
Own
fauLts
Out
chanGing
Is
litErally
Sorry
I am sorry for what I did to you Eric. I feel helpless, I can't stop thinking about it and I can't stop feeling absolutely 1000% horrid. Can I merit any sense of forgiveness?
I only wanted my stupid feelings to stop.
My fault is that I talked too much, I point that out, admit it and I intend to change. Some things you just never talk about.period.
Pointing
Own
fauLts
Out
chanGing
Is
litErally
Sorry
I am sorry for what I did to you Eric. I feel helpless, I can't stop thinking about it and I can't stop feeling absolutely 1000% horrid. Can I merit any sense of forgiveness?
I only wanted my stupid feelings to stop.
My fault is that I talked too much, I point that out, admit it and I intend to change. Some things you just never talk about.period.
posted by AngelAiken AKA Thee U.M.O.G at 3/16/2006 03:56:00 PM
3 Comments:
You bare no blame child. Stop this emotional suicide. Was I ever, in any way, inappropriate with you? Did I do anything of a sexual nature to you? Did I kiss you? Did I touch you in a way that made you feel it was sexual in nature or made you feel uncomfortable? At any time, in any way, was I making you feel like I made a pass or was coming on to you?
Answer this honestly and I will accept whatever you say as truth, just be sure it is the truth. I want to know. And so do others.
honestly, this is what I felt a few days ago, and my feelings have changed. I thought so many different things, I blamed my self but now I see that I bear none whatsoever. I am used to being blamed for things and I suppose that I expect it and automatically blame myself. I don't know really.
Honestly, you handled yourself better than I could ask, and if you knew the nature of what the poems above meant, it's that I am glad you handled it the way you did. I am angry at another I am in love with and I wish he would treat me as you did.
I felt horrible because you treated me so well and I thought that you might be getting kicked out for it. Do you see the dilemma?
I felt more safe than I have my entire life that day and I did not want anything bad to happen because of it.
Now, I see that I had nothing to do with it, but I am still angry at my other crush.
Eric: you have, and always will be my father in Christ.
You never did anything inappropriate or made me feel uncomfortable...
To have someone treat you like the queen that you somehow wish you are you feel...amazing, beyond words and to get a message that it(or something along those lines) might mean something bad makes you cry and freak out and I guess that you want to make everything alright again. Make it go away I guess?
I am having a hard time finding the words for what I really want to say but I think you get the point.
I must ask the same of you Eric.
Have I ever made you feel uncomfortable or that I was hitting on you?
I also wish to know this of you.
All is well Eric, do not despair, I am working things out slowly trying to grasp meaning. Have you read my modern free blog yet?
I went to church this week and I am glad I did, it really put me back in my spot.
I hope to hear from you soon.
Your daughter in Christ
Angel
yes, simply know that you have always been my Dad-E from day 1.
I remember when I first saw you at BASIC a year ago and I would have never imagined we would have this sort of talk going on.
I felt so many things that day, I felt the spirit of a loving dad.
My dad-e takes care of me, makes sure I won't hurt myself(which I have a reputation for) makes sure that I am living for god and is generally there for me and I am thankful for that. The same he gets from me. I enjoy the friendship that we have shared and I enjoy the openness that I am not used to having. Sometimes, I guess I am not sure how to handle being able to talk to someone because I suppose that I think that they will let me down somehow like everyone else has and I got to remind myself that he's my Dad-E, not perfect but why would he purposely do anything to harm me?
He hasnt at all.
I care for you, as a daughter should, I worry for your safety and emotional welfare. I want god to be in your life and your children's life.
Yes, you embody the spirit, and I am eternally thankful for it. I feel safe, and I am safe and always will be around you.
If I have not made that clear, I do now. No matter what crush I may have, or feelings at all for that matter, you will always be my father, and I can always be honest with you.
your daughter in Christ
Angel
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